I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
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