the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
