I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
last night I used snow as a chaser
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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