Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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