Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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