just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
All the doctor said was why
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
