Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
