this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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