I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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