hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
