Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
