Can Purell be used as lube?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
