The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
