I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize