you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
