So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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