I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
