well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
