found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
