Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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