***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
