I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I have feelings that need drinking.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
