ugly people sure do ruin things
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Randomize
