Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
