She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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