He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
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