They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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