hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
you had me at cake vodka
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
