One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
