Tell her she can't have a vagina
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
