bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
