I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i just google imaged poop.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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