If i could tip my vagina, i would.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
