well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
