if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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