And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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