My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
