So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
