Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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