I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
