Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
