Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
People with herpes should wear stickers.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
