mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
