Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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