I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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