But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
