I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
3 2 1 whiskey
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
