I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
