It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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