oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
